“Boy, toddlers can be rough, can't they?"

This morning, I realize that the fall at the beach a few posts ago wasn’t shaken off as easily as I had thought. She was eating breakfast and was chatting with B. Then, when B asked if D wanted to go to the lake, she said, “Boom. I go boom in water. Boom, I go boom in water.” PTSD? Hmmm.

A few minutes later, we head to a park that is a few miles away, and sometimes hard to get to for the directionally challenged (like me). But it’s a great park with swings, slides, a huge play area with bridges and ladders, and, for some reason, a dance pad.

 We were the only ones there, which is odd since it was already 9:30. The only ones, that is, until a another little girl and her mom show up. The first thing the little girl goes to is the dance pad--obviously she’s been here before. She starts pressing the buttons and lights start flashing and an incessant beat plays--sort of like the wordless dance music we used to hear in the early 2000’s at the Funky Buddha. Whatever.

When D hears the music she turns around, claims, “My park. My park,” and makes a beeline for the little girl and shoves her as hard as she can. The little girl’s face hits one of the dance pads. Ouch! Fortunately, there wasn’t any blood. And fortunately the girl’s mother didn’t notice until she heard my loud voice asking if the little girl was OK. I explained what happened, and the mom brushed it off with, “Boy, toddlers can be rough, can’t they?” So happy I got an understanding person and not a freak!

We checked the girl over--no bruises, just a few light scratches--and I took D by the arm and marched her to the girl and told her to apologize. She did, gave her a hug. I’m sure my face was red as we headed back to the car.

What's it like to be mocked by a 2 year old? Well...

Wife is out, and I have the kid. Started out as a great night. D and I had homemade mac and cheese left overs (she loves them), added a bit of chick for protein, and then read Ham (Green Eggs and Ham) for bedtime.

After getting D ready for bedtime, and about to put her in the crib, out of the blue, she says “potty,” and runs to the potty, and sits there. I ask, “Do you need to go potty?” and she looks up and smiles. I decide this is a not a continuation of last week (which she has not done again), but a plot to stay awake. I want to see how far this goes.

So, I tell her to remove her pants and to take off her diaper, and she does w/ some help. And then she sits there smiling. Smiling. Smiling. Looking down between her legs. Smiling. I look at her diaper, and it’s a bit buckled, so I know she’s already gone, and there won’t be anymore pee for a while. Sucker!

I tell her, “Nice try, we’ll do it again next time,” and dress her back for bed. She, of course, doesn’t want anything of the sort, so she jumps in her crib, asks me to turn her blankies into pillows, and then turn them back into blankies. I do this a couple times,and then tell her it’s bedtime, and leave.

So, she screams. And screams. And screams. I go back in after about 20 min of off-and-on screaming, and demand that she goes back to bed. And she does what I didn’t expect from my daughter until she was 12 or 13. She repeats my words in an incredibly sarcastic tone, “Go back to bed,” and then laughs. I almost burst out laughing, but a half-hour of screaming dampens the mood a bit. So, my first mock! Great.

Potty time success (short)

Well she did it! D actually peed in her potty! We thought at first that it was just a play to delay bedtime like it's been for weeks. But when she stood up there was a pool of pee. And then, of course the victory lap around our condo--5 or 6 times! So she succeeded on two counts: not only did she pee sans diaper she delayed bedtime almost 30 min. A good night.

Day at the beach!

Yesterday was a day at the beach! D loves the beach (who doesn’t I guess?) Every morning after breakfast, she asks, “Swings and slides? Sand and Water?” And since it’s a beautiful summer, we do at least one of those things each day. And since our beach has both swings and slides and sand and water--and it’s only 6 blocks away--it’s a blast. Usually.

This morning was like every other one for the past week. Beautiful, 70, few clouds, and the water is somewhat calm--it may be just a large lake, but the waves can get pretty big with the right conditions. Just small piddly waves greet us. D is having a blast walking hand-in-hand with me down the coast. She looks at some birds that are flying over head, lets go of my hand, and just stands there staring. Wish I had the camera.

She starts to walk again, but when I turn to look at her, I see a splash. She’s fallen into the water. I wait a few seconds waiting for her to stand up and laugh or cry. But she doesn’t do anything. She just lays there floating on the surface face in the lake. She’s not moving. It feels like minutes, but I know it’s only a few seconds. Maybe 4 or 5 before I jostle her and she lifts her head up and starts to cry. I hold her tight and then she wrestles out, looks at me and says, “Swings and slides?” and she runs towards them.

Wow, two year olds can be vindictive

D wanted to go outside and play with some friends. I looked out the window, saw her friends running around in the courtyard, and say, “OK. But first, *I* need to use the potty.”

D looks and me and says, “No. No potty. Downstairs.” I reply, “No, YOU don’t need to go potty. *I* do.” She pouts again, but I just walk into the bathroom and sit down. I leave the door cracked open, so I can see her. 


D comes up to the bathroom door, looks at me, and then turns to look at the shelf next to her filled with pictures of her cousins and aunties/uncles. She picks one up, looks at me and slams it down to the ground. BAM!


I look at her appalled at what I just saw. I’m sure my mouth is hanging wide open. I ask her, “What are you doing?” Then she turns to look at my reaction. I think she likes what she sees. So she does it again. I follow with my voice a bit louder, “What are you doing?!” And it proceeds with 5 more pictures. Voice gets louder and louder I’m sure my downstairs neighbors can hear.


Fortunately, none of the pictures had glass fronts. She probably would have enjoyed the breaking glass sound!


And there I was, on the potty.


Time out.

Hi, I just wanted to take the time to introduce myself

I’m Hsuan (Shen), and I’m a stay-at-home-dad. Now, I just wanted to get this out front--being a SAHD wasn’t my first choice. My first choice was to continue my profession as a copywriter, writing throw-away pieces for businesses big and small. First choices are not always the best choices, though.

Like many others, I’ve not been able to find significant long-term work for 18 months. So, my very patient wife and I decided that it would help us financially if we got rid of that huge daycare bill so I could be become a SAHD.

So that I wouldn’t go stir-crazy and have some creative outlet, she suggested I start a blog. I thought to myself, “Why would anyone want to read about a stay-at-home-dad?” Well, I found a number of SAHD blogs that were funny and/or poignant, and thought, hey, I want to do this.

So here I am, a 40+ year old SAHD caring for a just-turned-two year old daughter. Life throws you a lot of curve balls, doesn’t it? (Thus endeth the baseball metaphors. I promise!)